What is Domestic Bliss And How To Have It In Your Life Now
What is domestic bliss? Learn how to cultivate inner bliss that spills to all aspects of your life with our practical tips.
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Tl;dr: Resources to create domestic bliss now
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If you landed on this post, you’re most likely asking the all-important question, “What is domestic bliss and how can I have it in my life?”.
For many people, domestic bliss is synonymous with wedded bliss. You get married and then you live happily ever after.
The end.
Domestic bliss simply refers to a home environment where you are loved and accepted just as you are.
Whilst a happy marriage is certainly part of that (because you can’t really have domestic bliss if you’re unhappy in this most intimate partnership), the truth is that domestic bliss is far more inclusive.
And this post is all about enhancing our definition to reflect the fact that in these modern times, not everyone gets married anymore and yet everyone is still looking for — and I firmly believe entitled to — domestic bliss.
For more information on bliss — what it is, what it feels like, why you absolutely need it and how you can get it in your life, check out the resources below.
RESOURCES:
What Is Bliss – How can you know that you’re living a life of bliss if you don’t even know what it means? Find out what bliss really is so you too can start living the life you deserve.
How To Live A Blissful Life – Discover how to live the blissful life you deserve, why you need to start with your mind in order to succeed and what you need to do to prepare yourself for success.
Domestic bliss meaning: What is domestic bliss?
As I wrote in the previous section, contrary to what most people think, domestic bliss doesn’t just mean finding happiness in marriage or even in another type of intimate partnership.
Domestic bliss — whether you’re living on your own, with a partner or with children — is a human right.
Everyone is entitled to it, which is essentially nothing more than a family situation where you are accepted exactly as you are — faults and all.
Let me repeat that.
You don’t need to hide your weaknesses.
You don’t need to pretend to be strong at all times.
You can remove the mask that you show the rest of the world, knowing that you are and always will be celebrated, that your every emotion and every feeling will be validated and accepted, that your heart will be protected and cherished.
It’s a place, a state where you are securely loved, honoured, valued.
Caveat: We’re not talking about perfection here.
Domestic bliss means disagreeing with respect and aiming to resolve differences in a way that does not railroad the other.
Not never fighting with your partner or another family member.
Domestic bliss means knowing the difference between useless worrying and constructive problem-solving.
Not never worrying about anything ever again.
Domestic bliss means that when someone gets hurt, they know that the other has always got their back, that forgiveness will always be given and that each person will always strive to be better partners for the other.
Not the absence of hurt.
RESOURCES:
Affirmations For A Love-Filled Home — Sometimes, we can’t create domestic bliss because of our own limiting beliefs. Smash through them by using affirmations.
Affirmations or auto suggestions are essentially positive statements about something that are used to manifest a specific person, feeling or experience.
This post is your ultimate guide to generating love in your life and includes the positive affirmations that I use to manifest my life of bliss.
Why do we need to create domestic bliss?
Currently, there are great geopolitical and social upheaval in many countries, fewer marriages but more divorce and higher depression rates in people — young and old.
No wonder, people are having a hard time believing that they can be wealthy and happy.
I believe that we can help each other create our own domestic bliss.
We may live in a time when there is much unrest and the future is uncertain. But seven though the future is always uncertain, there are some things that we can change!
We can shape our domestic lives so that we don’t treat our partners and children as enemies and we look at ourselves with all the admiration that each of us deserves.
We can be thoughtful and generous towards others but also towards ourselves.
We can stop looking at people who may seem different from us on the surface and realise that they are fundamentally the same — they live and breathe and hope and fear and love.
Here at Live A Blissful Life, we believe that the dream of a better world begins in the four walls of our homes, in how we treat ourselves and how we treat our family and in our ability to create domestic bliss.
Together.
FAQ about domestic bliss
The following answers are brief responses to really important questions. Posts that tackle these in more depth will be linked as they are created.
Domestic bliss 1: Where do I start?
Before you begin, you might want to take a deep breath to calm your racing heart and then look at freeing up some time.
People these days are too anxious and far too busy and the thought of making any change or adding any new habits to an already packed schedule seems too much work.
We all know what happens when we think that something involves too much work, right? Most of us back off and never make the attempt.
After you’ve created some extra time, you need to find out your domestic bliss “base level” — where you are now, like when you get a stock inventory but you count feelings rather than things.
You’ll need to be very honest here.
How do you really feel about your current situation and what do you really need to make it better?
If you notice, the prep work you need to do is almost the same as when you’re creating a blissful life in general and not only domestic bliss, in particular.
The reason is the same.
As Jim Rohn said, “People who don’t plan, plan to fail.“
RESOURCES:
How To Get More Free Time — Written specifically for multitasking, creative free spirits like myself, this post will give you 3 actionable tips you need to get more free time.
Plus: A list of 4 personal time management systems that will help you accomplish your tasks in as little time as possible — resulting in more free time for all the other things you want to do. 🙂
How To Time Track — Learn how to time track effectively in four easy steps. This is basic step of time management that most people forget.
Time tracking helps you learn where your time is going and how much time it actually takes you to get things done (no more guesswork!).
Plus: A bonus list of all the tools you need to time track effectively.
What Is The Best Way To Prepare For Anything – Prep work is essential for the success of every plan. Discover the best way to prepare for anything you want to accomplish, every change you wish to implement and massively improve your results.
Remember Abraham Lincoln: “If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I’d spend the first four hours sharpening the axe.”
Winston Churchill: “Plans are of little importance, but planning is essential.”
And finally Stephen Keague: “Proper planning and preparation prevent poor performance.”
Domestic bliss 2: What do I do if my partner isn’t interested in domestic bliss?
We’ll have to answer with a quote from Gandhi, “If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.”
No, we cannot force someone else to change so we’ll need to let go of the expectation that other people should change because we think they should.
That said, we can change ourselves. Most often, this will pique other people’s curiosity enough to make them want to try it too.
So, focus on yourself first.
Do your own inner work.
Find out who you really are — you know, the person buried beneath the many responsibilities, expectations and disappointments life has heaped on you.
Craft from this knowledge, the rules you want to live by.
Fall in love with yourself, completely and totally.
And then, approach your significant other from this place of love. You’d be surprised at the difference this can make.
It’s possible that they’re only resisting because they don’t know exactly what kind of change you want to implement within your home.
Do you want to transform your house into a home — more than just a physical structure but also a sanctuary for every person who comes to visit?
Again, communication is key.
Remember that a good part of creating domestic bliss is a harmonious relationship with your nearest and dearest. That includes any partner and children you may have.
So, broach the subject. Talk to them properly. And who knows, you might even come away with a set of home rules that each member of the family is happy enough to comply with.
RESOURCES:
The Ultimate Guide to Self Love – The only post you’ll find that will give you all the information you need to finally fall in love with your own worthy self.
Meditation for Self Love – The best meditation to help you fall in love with yourself. If you’ve never listened to this before, you need to do so now. I included the script so you can also use it as an affirmation.
Top Self Love Resources – Clue’s in the name. These are the top resources I recommend to anyone wanting to discover and cultivate self love, possibly for the first time ever.
How To Date Yourself – Want to focus on yourself but haven’t got a clue what to do? This has got you covered with easy to implement ideas that will soon get you partying with the best person ever: yourself.
The Five Major Pieces To The Life Puzzle – A proper goldmine of information that is relevant to anyone wishing to live a blissful, purpose-filled life.
I especially love Chapter II: Attitude where Jim Rohn says that “how we feel is influenced by our associations” and I feel that this part is particularly relevant when you wish to create domestic bliss because it gives a clear strategy on how to deal with these relationships.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work – The best resource anyone involved with an intimate partner can consult. If you feel that your relationship is not as good as it can be or if you suspect that there is something going wrong, then this is the best book for you.
Pay close attention to the four horsemen and examine your relationship to see if they’re there. Then implement the recommended strategies as and when needed.
Domestic bliss 3: I have kids from hell, what do I do?
Ah, kids. We love them. We hate them. And we love them again. What is it with kids that they trigger so much mixed emotions in their parents?
This is a loaded question and one that really deserves an in-depth answer.
Look at this excerpt from Professor Matthew Johnson‘s article on Fortune:
“For around 30 years, researchers have studied how having children affects a marriage, and the results are conclusive: the relationship between spouses suffers once kids come along.
Comparing couples with and without children, researchers found that the rate of the decline in relationship satisfaction is nearly twice as steep for couples who have children than for childless couples.
In the event that a pregnancy is unplanned, the parents experience even greater negative impacts on their relationship.“
In this case, what do you do?
It’s important to first check your own language. Why do you think your kids are from hell? What specific behaviour and attitudes do they exhibit that make you think they are a factor in your domestic bliss?
The answers to these questions will prove enlightening.
Are your kids really misbehaving and if they are, are there external factors involved?
Is it perhaps a case of basic biology clashing with parental and societal expectations?
Could you have neurodiverse kids that need a unique touch?
Or maybe, it’s just a matter of adjusting your communication so you can be a more effective parent?
If this is what worries you, you’d probably benefit from learning how to be more peaceful without being less effective and how to communicate your feelings without causing power struggles.
Do you really need to say no that many times and in such a way (yeah, you know what we mean — exasperated, annoyed, angry)?
Do you get fed up with your children being boisterous and end up snapping at them to shut up?
Are you unable to unbend a little bit when they need your compassion and instead of empathising, you instead tell them to stop crying?
Is it really the kids?
Or is it the stress of meeting daily commitments impacting your mental health, making you unable to enjoy their childish antics?
Do you need to take a breather and spend more time just loving yourself?
Or perhaps this is the kind of relationship you have with yourself and so, you pass it on to your own children?
RESOURCES:
How To Be A Peaceful Parent — This post contains the 10 things you absolutely need to know when you’re transitioning from traditional parenting to one filled with respect for your child as a person.
If you’re used to spanking, humiliating, manipulating and such negative forms of interaction with your child but want to move away from it, then this is a must-read.
Bonus: It contains the resources you need to inform your decision.
What To Say Instead – A series of posts that seeks to improve communication between you and your child, these articles give you the words you need to help you avoid power struggles and tantrums by maintaining firm boundaries whilst giving your child the respect he deserves.
Domestic bliss 4: Can I create domestic bliss when I have no time or energy?
The answer is a resounding yes!
In fact, once you embark on the process, you actually start creating more time.
Yes, yes, we know that 24 hours a day is a given and you can’t really add to it. But, what if we tell you that those 24 hours are enough?
You can do everything you need and still have a life.
Intriguing, isn’t it?
Domestic bliss 5. How can I create domestic bliss when I’m buried in debt?
Oh, we feel you.
Really, we do.
We know what it’s like to be in debt and trying to survive on only one income. It’s not easy. At all.
It’s a great source of stress and it’s almost impossible to stop worrying about it — especially if the bills keep coming whilst your income dwindles.
You really need to do a lot of work to get yourself out of it.
First, you need to know your numbers and then put a financial plan in place.
Then, minimise your expenses, pay off your debt and increase your income.
Keep going and don’t give up.
But equally important, be gentle with yourself. Many people end up in debt for the simple reason that we don’t really get taught how to manage our finances whilst growing up.
So, pick yourself up and give yourself a tight hug. You’ve got this!
RESOURCES:
How To Clear Debt Fast – There’s a way out of debt and this post will help you find it. Read this post for our best tips on how to get rid of that debt as fast as you can.
How To Earn More Money Fast — Sometimes, the reason why you can’t pay your debt off is simply that you’re not earning enough to cover the basic necessities. Here are a few ways you can earn money fast — and most of them you can do from home!
If your schedule is so tight that you can’t possibly go to another location to do yet another job, you might benefit from working remotely. Check out our post on the hottest websites that offer legitimate remote work opportunities.
How To Improve Financial Literacy – Financial literacy begins in the home and as early as possible.
If you have children as young as two, start teaching them the basics of money management.
If you’re a parent or planning to be a parent, the resources in this post are a must-read for you.
They contain videos, books and apps that can help you manage your own finances so you can afford to have a child, make sure you don’t go into debt due to child-related expenses and teach your child effective money management skills so they don’t get into debt when they’re older.
Financial Planning Tips – Jam-packed full of tips that will allow you to manage your finances so you can get a handle on debt. Stop living paycheck to paycheck by following these quick and easy steps.
How To Manage Money – From the financial classic, The Richest Man in Babylon, this money management post will teach you not only how to manage money but also how to become wealthy and, more importantly, stay wealthy.
Living Beyond The 9-5 – Financial freedom – the ability to stop trading time for money – is a goal for many. This particular post and the series it introduces will give you a blueprint you can follow so you too can start living a blissful life free from the traditional constraints of a desk job.
Final thoughts on domestic bliss
Creating domestic bliss is something everyone can do, maybe not easily but certainly simply.
And it’s a lot of fun!
It doesn’t matter if you’re single, married or in a partnership.
It doesn’t matter if you have kids or you don’t. It doesn’t matter if you have a lot of money or are barely scraping by.
We can all create domestic bliss as long as we know how.
This is what this blog is about.
Join us on our journey and let our journey support yours!
How about you? What is your idea of domestic bliss and what do you do to create it? Write some of your ideas down and let’s start supporting each other!
Editor’s Note: This post was originally published in February 2019 and has been completely revamped and updated for relevance and comprehensiveness.
What is Domestic Bliss And How To Have It In Your Life Now
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Domestic bliss is indeed not only for the married ones but also for single people. We can also have domestic bliss at home. I didn’t know that domestic bliss is a human right. Does that mean that when neighbors are bothering me, harassing me, or doing anything else that makes me feel insecure and uncomfortable that they are attacking my human right?
A better world begins within the four walls of our homes, that’s very true, I agree with that. Home is a place of security, and hopefully also of problem-solving, finding solutions, alone or with someone. It is a place of safety, no one should take that away from you.
The books look very interesting. Would you recommend the first one “Nonviolent communication” to people with anger issues? Which of these would you recommend to someone who wants to create domestic bliss living alone?
My first question: You affectively said that “you can find time to work at attaining domestic bliss and still have a life. I don’t understand. What do you mean by that? It sounds to me like, take time out occasionally to nail down your domestic bliss so that it doesn’t escape, then get on with your life, isn’t domestic bliss part of your life?
You also talk about enhancing definitions. To me, that sounds like changing definitions, and I am not a fan of deconstruction. The part about financial planning was good – very important in a marriage.
I didn’t like the news from the researchers. In my mind selfishness, and bad parenting are to blame. We have trouble with our kids because not enough authority is shown. Young people need hard and fast rules otherwise you can forget domestic bliss. Badly behaved children who refused to do what they’re told, ruin it all. No wonder the childless couples are happier. All the new rules on parenting make things so difficult.
It was a long article, a little too long I thought.
Visually it was beautiful. I like the Pinterest box at the beginning. And no doubt you have recommended some good books.
I’m afraid I cannot disagree with you more.
Change is essential – especially when we’re faced with conflicting information. If our opinions are challenged by scientifically proven facts, then we must amend our opinions no matter how difficult they are.
If this is deconstruction then it can only be a good thing.
What the researchers have found is actually not new information. These findings have been around for at least 50 years.
Trying to cling to erroneous information does not serve us.
Decades ago, things like slavery, domestic abuse and criminalising homosexuality were accepted as normal. Thankfully, we’ve deconstructed those norms and arrived at new understandings.
Parenting is exactly the same.
Indeed we are all called to live a blissful life, though society and media paints a different picture. But the name Domestic Bliss really drives the point home and guides us to start from the foundation – “charity begins at home”. Having practiced the act of instant blissfullness i have come to realize that our joy lies within and nothing external can take away our bliss without our consent. And when we find ourself out of joy, we can instantly return our mood to a state of bliss if we so desire. Thanks for creating this wonderful site for us.